Presence and Intention

I’m not really a “new year, new me” kind of person. I do, however, love an unattainable target. I regularly set myself goals—ones I don’t write down, don’t hold myself accountable for, and don’t even tell anyone about. Not the best role modelling for a coach, I know. 

I do, of course, write loads of goals down, actively work towards them, and achieve them, but my downfall are the ones that are focused on self-care. Anything to do with my own health and wellbeing tend to fade into nothing.

So, when someone on a podcast asked, “What are your words for 2025?” it resonated so much more than the usual “What are your New Year’s resolutions?”

When I reflect on the past year, I can’t deny that I’ve accomplished a lot. We moved to Portugal. We settled the kids into a Portuguese-speaking school (despite them not speaking a word of Portuguese when we arrived). We navigated the immigration system and finally got our visas. I qualified as a coach, set up as a freelancer, launched my coaching practice, signed my first clients, and continued working as an English teacher.

It’s been a big year—one focused on finding our feet here. And while I’m proud of what we’ve achieved, there are things I want to do better.

I don’t regret anything, but I know I haven’t always been intentional in my actions. I’ve wasted hours scrolling through mindless content on my phone, skipped opportunities to leave the house and work somewhere more inspiring, and pushed off personal goals with a vague “I should” rather than actually taking action.

And while my business head has worked hard to network with many incredible entrepreneurs here in the Algarve, my friendship hat has been left behind. Of course, I’ve met loads of lovely people and enjoy spending time with my husband’s colleagues too, but have I found my own close circle? Not yet.

I recently drove over an hour to meet another expat in a similar situation. I was dreading the drive, but I went anyway—and it was so worth it. I discovered a beautiful new place, had breakfast at a riverside café, and spent time connecting with someone who truly understood where I was coming from.

It was an intentional action and reminded me that intentional effort yields rewards.

So, one of my words for 2025: intention.

I want to approach my decisions—big and small—with more purpose. Why am I still mindlessly scrolling social media for hours? Why am I eating more chocolate or adding sugar to my coffee when I know I don’t need to? Why haven’t I gone to work in the library? It's only three minutes from my house and I can see peacocks strutting around outside, but instead I stay cooped up in my tiny office. 

I don’t know the answer. 

If I ask myself these questions throughout the year though, and can’t find a good answer, I know it means I need to redirect my energy.

By being more intentional, I believe I can also improve my presence—my second word for 2025.

Presence with my family, especially.

I have two boys, ages six and two. They are loud, full of energy, they eat an inexplicable amount of food, and never fail to wake up before 6:30 a.m. I love them to bits, obviously, but I am knackered! Like many parents, I’m sure, I lean on screens to buy myself a moment’s peace.

The result? They zone out, I zone out, and nobody’s batteries are actually recharged; instead, we end up in the endless cycle of stress and frustration: I’m snappy, they mirror my stress, and everyone feels frazzled.

So how do I change this?

I’ve realised I don’t need the parenting advice from social media that I’ve been bombarded with over Christmas and New Year—I just need time.

• Time to read a book instead of scrolling on my phone.

• Time to paint my nails (one of the small joys of leaving clinical nursing was being able to wear nail polish again).

• Time to breathe: to meditate, practice yoga, and embrace moments of stillness.

None of this takes much time. It just requires intention.

I’ve already started making small changes. My phone now charges in the office overnight, and I read a book before bed, one with real paper pages and everything! I still aim for the gym three times a week, and even if I only make it twice, that's OK. Last weekend, I painted my nails whist talking to my son: it took all of 15 minutes, neither of us were upset by the combination of nail painting, train sets and chat, and now, I have lovely colourful nails to look at, which makes me smile.

I recently learnt about the Japanese concept of Ma—the intentional pause. It is the space between things: a moment to reflect, transition, and breathe. Using this concept throughout my day will allow me to reflect and transition between activities, improving both my intention and presence with myself and the world around me.

So, my words for 2025: presence and intention.

I will be intentional in my actions—making conscious choices about how I spend my time, where I direct my energy, and what I prioritise.

And I will be present—fully engaged with my kids, my husband, my work, and myself. I’ll remind myself that downtime is okay, that the TV isn’t the enemy, and that even a messy 10-minute craft session can create memories worth cherishing.

I hope my words resonate with you. Maybe you’re also craving a bit more intention and presence in your life. 

With all the dreams and unknowns that 2025 is sure to throw at us, I’m hoping that allowing myself the space to breathe, and having these two words, intention and presence, at the forefront, will allow us to navigate whatever comes our way with more ease and clarity.

What are your words for this year?